THE MAJOR REASON A HOTEL OR MOTEL WOULD NOT SHOW PORNOGRAPHY

At first glance a hotel or motel might see putting adult videos on its TV menu as just another neat way to make money. It also gives its customers more options. However, after working with sex industry issues for ten years, Adults Saving Kids would respectfully ask hotels and motels to consider the human side of this issue.

The first question is how other people get into the business of selling their own bodies to be viewed by others. Two words come into view here. The first is Vulnerability. Something is going on in the lives of young people which make them vulnerable to being used in the sex industry. This pre-conditioning can be summed up in three ways. First, there is unaddressed. trauma. How many young people do you know that have faced traumatic situations in their lives? Let us take a main concern: child sexual abuse. In Minnesota the Minnesota Committee for the Prevention of Child Abuse states one of three girls will be raped by the time they are 18 and one of seven boys. They say these figures are conservative and align with national figures. How many of these young people actually get the attention and therapy they need? Not many. So here we have a considerable part of the population walking around wounded with this particular unaddressed. trauma. Add to these, the youth who face break-up in the home, the loss of one parent, grief issues, foster care issues, poor grades, chemical issues, rejection issues, etc.

Secondly, many youth in America feel unloved by their parent(s). This might be their own perception and it might be that parent(s) just don't have time or priority for their youth. It might also be that their parent(s) react strongly to them becoming more independent. In any case this feeling of not being loved sets them up as vulnerable to other voices.

Thirdly, many youth are naive or inexperienced with manipulations and scheming. They trust strangers and try to be nice. Maybe they are socialized to be that way. Some just simply have poor defense mechanisms or because of ADD, depression, chemical imbalances or other handicaps are just not able to see treachery coming and become "easy pickings" or "fair game". In this regard it is worthwhile to think of youth one cares about.

The second word is Recruitment. Lost in the hype, the so called glamour, the "big" money, the euphemisms (gentlemen's clubs, adult entertainment) is the reality of pimping activity and pimping techniques. Young people such as those mentioned above are targets for those who have mastered the art of engaging, manipulating, deceiving, and possibly coercing young people to enter their trap and then having the trap close. Once young people (the average age of getting into prostitution in the United States is 14) begin to be used sexually as in pornography or prostitution, the shame, guilt, mind control techniques they have been subjected to, the circumstances of burning their bridges with family and not seeing where else to turn plus the ever present intimidation of the pimping people, keep them solidly in the trap which has been sprung.

So what's the point? This means that everyone selling sex including those who rent out adult videos are participating in this whole process of harming young people. As long as there are people out marketing pornography, there will be a need for pimping people to go out and recruit some vulnerable young people--both girls and boys. The question facing hotel and motel owners or managers is whether, in looking at young people one knows, can a person with integrity participate in this process? Yes, there will be those who take advantage of the youth including young people just out of high school, but does this mean that any one person personally and his or her hotel or motel need to go along and add on to the harm already being done?

Now many people might argue that no harm is being done. They might point to all the strippers and Playboy playmates who say they are having fun, it is a nice career and they like the money. We at Adults Saving Kids wish that were true. However, having dealt with the survivors of all this for ten years and with agencies all over the country who have worked with this population, we have come to understand the tragedy that is taking place in the lives of many who are selling themselves. This is not pretty at all.

Think with us for a moment. Imagine a person you know and love. Let us say for whatever reason, they are now caught in the business of selling themselves sexually in pornographic movies. How are they going to handle that? Won't they need a way to numb the personal pain, guilt and shame they experience? Won't that lead them to chemical addiction? It does for most. Won't that put them in a position of just being used by more people, of being treated as a commodity, a thing? Wouldn't that set them u[p for being beaten, possibly murdered or for committing suicide? That too is happening a lot. If they survive this ordeal, what is going to be the future for them and their children? Are you prepared as a relative or friend to stand with them for years and years as they seek to recover from their brokenness?

There is a last point to be made. We now see the reality of Sexual Addiction which grips many American lives, estimated at 10% of all Americans. People not only want to see naked bodies but they get consumed with sex and pornography with leads progressively to using other people and further in some cases to becoming serial murderers. Pornography becomes like a drug. Yes, it is legal to show pornography. The question here is whether a hotel or motel wants to risk participating in a patron's demise. It must be asked whether this is actually serving the patron or contributing to their harm and their families' anguish. As sexual addiction becomes more widely understood, the day will come then those who have sold sex will be seen as destructive people. A hotel or motel which respects youth, their inexperience, their vulnerability and their families and takes into account its patrons' weaknesses will look closely at what it means to serve its guests with integrity.