The STOPLight

Survivors' stories dispel myths surrounding prostitution

"When I was thirteen, my father started pimping me to his friends down at the bar."

"I was so naive about adult relations that I literally did not know what the men wanted."

"I was sold to a pimp when I was thirteen years old."

"I was so young, and this man was hurting me. I was laying there crying and whimpering and he did not care."

These are the voices of survivors of prostitution. When we begin to listen we begin to understand. We start to see, as they see, the connections which bind up prostitution, child abuse, and rape under the name of violence, and we come to an understanding that these forms of violence are parameters of a world in which men's desires become women's reality.

These women are talking and they need to be heard.

Two such survivors are Evelina Giobbe and Carolyn Brown.

Brown appeared in the award-winning documentary "We're Here Now," and has spoken on television and given talks on the topic of prostitution.

Giobbe, who is currently a faculty member at the University of Minnesota in the Women's Studies Department, is founder of WHISPER, a national support network for survivors of prostitution.

The main focus of WHISPER, besides outreach and advocacy, is education. Giobbe believes that it is important to dispel some of the myths surrounding prostitution.

"This is not something you choose to do; it is something that is done to you. The average age of entrance into prostitution is fourteen and the majority of these girls are women of color with no job skills and a history of childhood abuse, rape and battery."

Besides racism, classism, and sexism, Giobbe cites a lack of educational opportunities for women as a problem. "It's not a woman's choice to work the streets if she is given other choices."

Carolyn Brown adds that "for every girl out on the corner, there are three men behind her with a boot in her ass; the man who taught her she was nothing but a sexual object, her pimp who beats on her and the drug dealer who keeps her in debt."

Giobbe believes that the function of prostitution is to allow unlimited access to women and children for sexual use by men. "This is not merely economic exchange. This is an ongoing sexual assault on a daily basis."

Both women feel that the church has an important role to play if anything is to be done about prostitution, and yet often, according to Brown, the church does not want to hear about uncomfortable issues like prostitution or abuse. "I grew up in a Lutheran church, was confirmed, taught Sunday School and sang in the choir.

Then when I began having hurt and pain they didn't want to see me."

Brown, who was sexually assaulted by both her dentist and a school counselor, says that her church did not know how to deal with and simply turned its back on her.

"I found American Indian religion where I got a great deal of acceptance and, more importantly, respect from the men."

In spite of this, she believes that the church can lead on this issue.

Giobbe feels that the church should be involved in this issue for the simple fact that "if the church doesn't start to be the one to say that a woman has value as an eternal being, and that women and children have souls and are not simply disposable objects to be bought and sold, then no one will. The church is called to heal."

Giobbe sees part of the reluctance of people to reach out to victims of prostitution as one of attitude. "Having the right pastoral approach is important."

Brown states that it is important to look at people and their problems as a process. "These people didn't just appear out of the ground. Someone taught them this. If people are told all their lives that they are nothing, they are not going to create anything wonderful to help the world. Nobody told Jesus Christ he was a nothing or a nobody. They tell me kings came to see him when he was a child. He didn't just appear one day and start his ministry. It was a process. Charles Manson didn't just appear. He was born to a prostitute and raised on the streets. He hardly knew his mother. He's the end product of a process of throw-away children."

One person who is reaching out is Lutheran pastor Al Erickson who has started a ministry called Grassroots. Grassroots seeks to re-root churches in the community by working with and training people to help themselves and to become leaders in their own neighborhoods.

Part of the problem, according to Erickson, is that too often churches are not part of the community.

"Trying to lob help over the wall doesn't work. We have to dialogue with wounded people. We have to be good listeners and not do things for people but empower them to take control of their lives."

Brown encourages Christians to reach out to those who are not like them.

"A lot of Christians just want to be with their own kind. These are not separate people. These are not people with green skin, tails and horns. These are loving, caring human beings with families, feelings and with pain. And more sinned against than sinning."

In 2002 our organization changed its name to Adults Saving Kids. Prior to that we were called A-STOP (Alliance for Speaking Truths On Prostitution), STOP (Speaking Truths On Prostitution), or Grassroots Ministry Alliance.