The STOPLight

How S.T.O.P. came to be

I never wanted to get involved with prostitution. In fact, I tried to stay away from that whole arena. I didn't want to know any prostitutes or be affected by what was happening out there.

Regardless, prostitution grabbed me and shook me hard, like King Kong playing catch with me on top of the Empire State Building. I found that I was utterly helpless in the face of the devastating hold prostitution had on a family member. I discovered how feeble the system is in doing anything about people caught in the grip of prostitution. I discovered how lonely it is to even try.

The devastation of people's lives and the pain experienced by participants and family shocked me. I couldn't believe that all this could be happening right here in my own society.

And yet, after searching around and turning over many rocks, I found there really are people doing something about prostitution, and that gave my family and me a spark of hope.

Hurt and horror did not create S.T.O.P. Those things have always been there.

S.T.O.P. grew from three separate roots.

First are a number of people who have either experienced the monstrous effects of prostitution or who have listened and decided to fight its oppression. There are people who understand that the cost of prostitution in youths' lives is far too high and believe that significant steps must be taken. It is time to claim these people's commitment and energies so we can grow in numbers and impact.

The second root producing S.T.O.P. is the significant efforts being made in a number of cities to counteract prostitution. In the Twin Cities there are the efforts, for example, of Lutheran Social Services of St. Paul on the streets, Family & Children's Services' Pride program, Project Offstreets, and WHISPER. Being a community-based volunteer group, S.T.O.P. can work in tandem with such organizations to learn from, solidify, enhance and multiply their efforts.

Thirdly, S.T.O.P. has come into being because of growing public concern for sexual assault, domestic violence and child sexual abuse. All these formerly grassroots movements have come to some degree of sophistication. Hot-lines, crisis centers, shelters, interviews, treatment procedures, legal adjustments, special training, etc., though often insufficient, have all become a part of the scene. They have opened dialogue about hidden areas of people's lives which previously seemed impossible to confront.

Once the conspiracy of silence is broken, truth opens the possibility for dealing with what is there, even in the forbidden realm of prostitution.

We live in an inquisitive society. Even truths about prostitution cannot be hidden forever. The myth that has portrayed prostitution as an acceptable career and an adult choice has started to crumble, and we're beginning to get the real picture.

We have seen sexual abuse for what it is and what it does. We have seen how many people running from sexual abuse inadvertently end up in the arms of the sex industry. We can see how vulnerable runaway and throwaway children are when they get out on the street, and the lack of provision for these children. We can see how clever and destructive are those who have decided to profit from the misfortune of others. We can see how entangled a person becomes who is caught in this web of so-called love: abuse, violence and drugs.

Despite all this knowledge, we as a society and as individuals really haven't mustered up the courage to do anything about it.

Throughout this country people in prostitution are viewed as bad or different. This gives us license to keep our distance and this attitude leaves the victims no space for recovery. Professionals such as doctors, judges, police and pastors, if they say anything, often ask prostitutes "Why don't you just get out of it?"

Blaming prostitutes and expecting them to see alternatives and feel powerful enough to pursue them is unrealistic. Such attitudes further entrap these victims.

One of the goals of S.T.O.P. is to dispel myths and end misconceptions about prostitution; misconceptions which prolong the conspiracy of silence and condemnation, which, in turn, close off healthy options.

The primary goal of S.T.O.P. is to end the cycle of abuse inherent in prostitution.

Various surveys of people in prostitution show that well over half were sexually abused before entering prostitution. Once involved, the abuse worsens and the damage goes deeper. The whole scene of pimps, johns, prostitutes and children of prostitutes is filled with abuse. The abused becomes the abuser and perpetuates the cycle. Untreated child prostitutes go on to be untreated adult prostitutes.

This cycle must be interrupted. The abusers must find healing and recovery or the travesty continue. Johns (customers) and pimps must face significantly severe consequences of the devastation they perpetuate. They must be worked with to help them change their mindset and pursue a lifestyle which does not destroy others or foster new problems — for themselves and their families.

It must be emphasized that S.T.O.P. is not a hate movement. S.T.O.P. seeks to create a place where people can consider how former abuse may have affected them and to make them aware of what they can do about it.

Firmness and decisive action to accomplish these goals can be exercised in a spirit of caring. Laws need to be changed. Blind spots need to be confronted.

For all this to happen there must be a growing conversation about these issues created at all levels of our society. Starting in Minnesota and connecting with other parts of the country through a newsletter, educational efforts and a resource center, S.T.O.P. will be instrumental in generating this discussion.

As S.T.O.P. grows and gains the volunteers and support it needs, it will achieve an ever greater capacity to raise and address these questions and provide resources, references and support for those concerned with coming to terms with the truths about prostitution.