The STOPLight

Reality check: What is prostitution?

When you see the movies Milk Money or Pretty Woman, what comes to your mind? Are these women glamorous? Do they make a lot of money? How are these movies similar? They are both about prostitution. When people watch these movies, they see the glamour, the money being made, and the dream relationships that come at the end. But prostitution -- no matter what form it takes -- is still prostitution. Whether it's stripping, dancing, escort services, gang initiation or exchanging sex for anything, prostitution is an abusive form of sexual abuse, plus mind and power control.

Many young women believe they will make big money dancing, but the reality is that dancers will be and are solicited for sex. Management fines dancers severely if they refuse to have sex with customers. Most girls and women who start out dancing or stripping end up working the streets, turning tricks in apartments, offices, parks, and cars. Their dreams of big money turn into nightmares.

A young woman may think working through an escort service will keep her safe and guarantee lots of money. In most cases, a boyfriend or protector enters the picture and usually turns into a pimp. He uses threats and intimidation to keep her working so he can profit from what she makes. The glamour turns into a horror story for her; for him, she is a dollar sign.

In order to survive the young woman emotionally separates her outer-self from her inner-self and loses her own identity, self-respect, pride, and self-esteem, thus allowing her to remain stuck in a lifestyle that is degrading, unhealthy, and potentially deadly.

There are many different reasons that young people get involved in prostitution. You don't just wake up and say, "Well, I think I want to be a prostitute." Prostitution is not a victimless crime, a choice, or a career. It's a power trip for the pimps and johns -- and power almost always means abuse.

Ask yourself questions like these: Does your boyfriend want you to earn money by having sex with other people? Do you pay for things you want with sex? Does your drug habit make you do things you regret later?

If you or someone you know feels strung-out, used, trapped or beaten down, do not despair. There are people who have experienced what you are going through. No matter where you are, help is close by. Pick up the phone and call your local crisis hotline to ask about programs for people in prostitution.